The Rantings of a Black Woman Who’s in Love With a White Man

While making my matcha latte this morning, these thoughts rattled around inside my brain, so I thought I would share them. I have never been asked these questions, but I figured they would make for a lighthearted read. Here goes:

No one: I see you with this white man. So do you hate black men?

Me: No, I do not hate black men. I was married to two different black men for a total of 20 years. I also have 2 beautiful black kings, 1 beautiful black prince, a gorgeous queen and 3 incredibly beautiful black-ish grand babies. They really are something to look at, and proud of the skin in which they reside.

No one: Why do you call your grand babies black-ish?

Me: Well, I got the expression from the widely popular television show of the same name. My grand babies are biracial…just watch the show and it will make sense. It is streaming right now on Hulu.

No one: With all the racial tension in our country right now, do you find it difficult to be in a relationship with a white man?

Me: Nope. This particular white man does not agree with what the ‘others’ (meaning the hateful white folk) are doing. He listens (and agrees) when I share my frustrations without offering to fix it. Ooohh! Speaking of fixing things, stop right now and listen to Sam Smith sing Fix You in his most angelic voice.

Also me: Our relationship is not about the glaring obviousness of our racial differences. We are two people who fell in love who just happen to be black and white (I’m pretty sure you are now singing, Ebony and Ivory by Michael Jackson and Paul McCartney). Oh, and I’m sure if he (Robert, not Michael) were here right now, he would want me to share that according to his DNA test, he is 2% Sub-Saharan African. Which actually makes sense given his full lips and whatnot.

Robert doing his happy dance

Me again: I am tired of explaining to people about the all lives matter, black lives matter issue. Just love each other. How difficult is it? And, speaking of love, go ahead and listen to an oldie but goodie by Black eyed Peas, Where is the Love?

(Still me): I mean seriously, for the white people who hate black people, it can’t be the color of our skin, because, well, spray tans and whatnot. It’s not our hair, because we would catch a case if we smacked the hands of every white person that wanted to touch it. For real. What is it? Do you even know? Probably not, so since it is easier to love, try that. You’ll like it. Like Mikey. And Life cereal.

That One Day When God

Why do we put God in a box? Why do we try to limit One who is limitless? Until today, I referred to God as Him. I was driving (where I do most of my thinking) and I thought, Hmm, God is neither male nor female. Or is God both? I came to the conclusion that God just IS. If we were created in the image of God, then God is male and female. God is every color. Why? Because God is a spirit. No form. God is so big. God defies definition. God is you. God is me.

So many people want to use God as a weapon, killing people with judgement in the name of the Most High. If we serve a God of love, then how can this behavior be justified? Whatever stand you take on abortion or homosexuality, infidelity or divorce, is yours and yours alone. No one is qualified to stand in judgement of any other person. No one.

I cannot understand why people who believe in God would rather hate and judge than share and love. God is such a force that we could never begin to understand it. God’s very existence produces life. How can we try to contain that force? Imagine the most powerful force on Earth. Now multiply that by infinity. Our finite minds truly cannot even imagine infinity. Not while we reside in these very limited, though perfect (because we are created by God) bodies.

That is why I cannot picture heaven as angels, wings, halos and pearly gates. God is so much bigger than that. I said in an earlier blog that if God created Earth with all it’s magnificence and placed us here to live, why would heaven (or eternity, as I like to refer to it) be different. I would love to spend eternity in a place like Earth, but perfect. Honestly, I cannot fathom eternity. I believe that each one of us is so unique that our eternity matches who we are. Who God created us to be.

I have an idea. Let’s each ask God how we should be living our lives. Our life plans truly don’t matter if we leave God out of the equation. God sees the entire picture, beginning to end. We have the awesome gift of free will, but if we don’t know what to do with it, what is the point? We raise our children to be good people, to contribute positively to society, but we also give them the freedom to make the choices that will lead to what we hope will be successful lives. So if we, as finite creatures can love and lead and guide our children, how much more can an infinite Being do the same and more for us?

Take a step back. Take God out of your box. Live.